Wandering Eye: Baseball players and their Muppet twins, the decline of Tiger Woods, and more

Last Friday, word spread on Twitter, by way of The Sun's Justin Fenton, that Howard Stern Show cohost Robin Quivers and baseball great and former Oriole Eddie Murray were at the Orioles game together. This led us to joke to Fenton that perhaps they were an "item." From there, for reasons that we're not entirely sure of—though we'll blame it on the sack of super-duper strong weed we bought—we began tweeting out other combinations of former O's and Stern regulars: Richard Christy/Storm Davis and High-Pitch Eric/Sammy Stewart were our weird ones, and then Fenton and City Paper's Brandon Weigel chimed in with a few too. It was the goofiest Twitter thing we've started. But then we were topped this week by Vice Sports contributing editor and co-founder of the Classical, David Roth, who went a lil' bit viral with his pairings of baseball players and their Muppet twins. He tweeted one out and then a few friends joined in and then some strangers and he had a goofy Internet game for a slow Wednesday night. So, he wrote about it yesterday and gathered a few favorites. "I don't know," Roth writes in "Baseball Players and Their Muppet Twins: An Exploration" over at Vice Sports, "I mean, I know why I did it—because I was bored, am an idiot, and wanted to make a stupid noise on the internet—but I don't know why I bothered." (Brandon Soderberg)

 

The idea of a basic guaranteed income paid to every citizen regardles of need has been kicked around in academic circles for many decades, usually by utopian socialists animated by great hopefulness. Here's a piece by Scott Santens on Medium urging, well, urgency. Self-driving trucks are coming soon, see, and that's not a curiosity. It turns out that "truck driver" is the most common job in 28 states. (OK, not really, if you look at the data consistently). But there are still lots of people dependent on truck drivers. "According to the American Trucker Association, there are 3.5 million professional truck drivers in the US, and an additional 5.2 million people employed within the truck-driving industry who don't drive the trucks. That's 8.7 million trucking-related jobs," Santens writes. Truck drivers make about $40,000, so it's "just about the last job in the country to provide a solid middle class salary without requiring a post-secondary degree." Truckers also spend money on the road—on food, hotels, etc. Since self-driving freight trucks are already on the road, he figures it's only a matter of a decade or two before all the truck-driving jobs go away. (So too bus drivers, cabbies, etc.) The answer: welfare for all. Let's stop pretending we, as workers, really earn our keep and instead (somehow) put in place a (computerized, automated) check-writing/balance transfer system that gives everyone X dollars a week to spend. "Without a technological dividend, the engine that is our economy will seize, or we will fight against technological progress itself in the same way some once destroyed their machine replacements," Santens warns. "No one should be asking what we're going to do if computers take our jobs. We should all be asking what we get to do once freed from them." (Edward Ericson Jr.)

 

In case you didn't know, Tiger Woods is now really bad at golf. The once-dominant Woods, who looked like he could go down as the greatest golfer in history, has everyone shaking their heads as he hacks it up on the golf course. Yesterday at the British Open, Woods carded a four-over 76 at the Old Course in St. Andrews, a venue he once dominated. Woods' poor play has caused The Washington Post's Dan Steinberg to reach this conclusion: Watching Tiger in 2015 is like watching Willie Mays during his brief stint with the Mets at the end of his career. As Steinberg notes, the lead of the New York Post following Game 2 of the World Series said Mays "looked like a stumbling clown in the outfield he once patrolled so superbly." Says Steinberg: "It's like seeing your childhood home demolished, or your favorite comic forget his punchlines. For much of my 20s, Tiger Woods was embarrassing the rest of golf. The sport was never supposed to embarrass him back." (Brandon Weigel)

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