Wandering Eye: APG posts a want ad for an aerostat minder, Hogan's BaltimoreLink bus plan echoes The Onion, and more

Less than a month before the JLENS aerostat got free of its Aberdeen proving Ground mooring and sailed into Pennsylvania, APG posted a want ad for an aerostat minder. “The candidate will be a Field Service Technical Support Representative who will be required to learn to monitor JLENS equipment, Snow removal procedures and/or other site support duties by training on-the-job at Aberdeen Proving Ground (APG) where he/she will be managed day-to-day by the Site Manager,” the ad reads. It specifies a candidate who can work a flexible schedule with day and night hours shifting, “perform physically challenging labor,” and “work in extreme weather conditions for extended periods of time.” The candidate would need to have or obtain a “secret” clearance and—this is key—must have the “Ability to apply logic and common sense to overcome obstacles.” The Linkedin ad we found had, at the time the runaway blimp touched down, zero applicants. (Edward Ericson Jr.)


One of the many rewarding aspects of working at CP is seeing what our interns end up doing after their time working with us. Carley Milligan, an intern alumna who wrote a great piece for us on drug usage and drug safety at music festivals, is the editor-in-chief at Towson University's student newspaper, The Towerlight. A few weeks ago she co-wrote a great article in The Towerlight about activists and racial issues on Towson University's campus. Our photo intern from the summer, Reginald Thomas II, who wrote some great pieces for us, continues to take some stunning photos. This week, UMBC's The Retriever Weekly, whose EIC Sam Manas is a CP intern alum, published a great piece of student journalism by its News Editor Mark Satter. He looks into the termination of SUCCESS, a special-education program at UMBC for intellectually disabled students that was supposedly being phased out for financial reasons. But SUCCESS is completely funded by outside organizations and is revenue positive, Satter found. Instead, he writes, the end of the program seems to come from legal concerns from the threat of a lawsuit from one student regarding a filed report of sexual assault, as well as the administration's ongoing concerns about the program. "According to [a parent of a SUCCESS student], UMBC’s legal counsel 'felt that SUCCESS was too much of a liability from the very beginning,'" Satter writes. "Before the program took its first students, there was a plan to provide on campus housing for SUCCESS. According to an anonymous source, Gleasan advised against providing on-campus housing for liability reasons, so the plan was shelved." (Here are the details about applying for an internship at CP, if you're interested.) (Anna Walsh)


Via Michael Farley on Facebook: Along with a link to a 2010 The Onion parody video with the headline, "Obama Replaces Costly High-Speed Rail Plan With High-Speed Bus Plan," the ArtFCity editor and City Paper contributing writer added, "Okay, I have remained largely silent about the insane #‎LarryHogan transit plan that seems to just involve renaming everything LINK and drawing a series of seemingly random color-coded lines on a map. Because at this point, caring about infrastructure in this stupid country is like doing a raindance in the Sahara except its bad for your health instead of at least providing exercise. BUT can one of my friends at Baltimore City Paper please do a 'Wandering Eye' about how Hogan's post-Red Line transportation plan is literally ripped from the headlines of an old Onion article?" Farley even added, "Brandon Soderberg I think you're the only one left at CP who is snarky enough to handle this linkage with the vitriol and wit it deserves," which I will take as a compliment and take him up on that challenge.

OK so yeah, we'll give it a try. Sure, this is better than nothing, but besides Hogan's $135 million bus plan BaltimoreLink being a retread of some ideas already floating around for years (like the Bus Network Improvement Project) and, you know, that whole thing about the other hundreds of millions that fool swiped from our city, we should talk about what it is like to ride a bus, especially in Baltimore, even if soon-ish, maybe, there will be more of them darting all around to more places or whatever. You have to wait for them and you have to wake up extra early to catch them to get to work and it is all a very soul-crushing experience that often adds hours and hours to one's commute. So like a normal work day of nine hours might be a 10- or 11- or 15-hour day depending on a number of issues, and they take long and it does little if you don't also have something like the Red Line for fuck's sake. These are the kinds of things I just don't think burbs-appealing Boss Hög really considers or just doesn't give a shit about. (Brandon Soderberg)

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