A Center Stage playwright wrote a one-minute play about me during lunch. You can get one too

Thursdays at the City Paper offices often means lunch at the Kooper's Chowhound Burger Wagon parked two blocks away at North Calvert and East Monument streets. On our way to the line last week, we happened upon Center Stage playwright Rich Espey, sitting at a table near the truck while tapping out custom-written one-minute plays for anybody who wanted one.

So, when asked, we jumped at the chance. After a brief conversation about things such as our favorite food (tacos, even though we were in line for burgers) and our last vacation (Nuremberg, Germany), Espey started to write. Later that evening, "Tacos in Nuremberg" (below) popped in our inbox.

The on-the-spot writing sessions are part of Center Stage's Wright Right Now program, offering patrons a chance to see how the creative process works. You can get a play of your very own on select Thursdays before a performance, at the theater's Creative Mornings open house, or at the Kooper's truck on Thursdays from 11 a.m.-1:30 p.m. until it gets too cold.

Tacos in Nuremberg

BRANDON walks up to a food truck. There's a cook, HILDE, in the window of the truck taking orders.

BRANDON
I'd like a taco. Make it two. Well, three. No breakfast today.

HILDE
Wurst?

BRANDON
I'd like your best.

HILDE
Wurst is best.

BRANDON
What else is there?

HILDE
Kassler rippchen?

BRANDON
Gesundheit.

HILDE
It's pig muscles. What is it you call it? Pork chop.

BRANDON
Do you have barbacoa?

HILDE
No.

BRANDON
OK, I guess pork chop is OK. Do you at least have salsas?

HILDE
Four kinds.

BRANDON
Which are?

HILDE
Sauerkraut, sauerkraut with apple, sauerkraut with pig . . . um, "pork," and chipotle.

BRANDON
Oh, chipotle! Now we're getting somewhere!

HILDE
Pumpernickel or pretzel tortilla?

BRANDON
On second thought . . .

BRANDON walks away.

HILDE
(calling after) I don't go to Nogales for knockwurst!!

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