Dan Savage

Columnist Savage Love

Recent Articles

  • Savage Love: Gender Solid

    Savage Love: Gender Solid

    Gender Solid You may not be the right person to answer this, but your commenters might be able to help. I love and support my friends who are transgender, but I don’t understand all the 18- to 21-year-olds among my friends who are declaring themselves “gender-neutral.” I am a bit older and have...

  • Savage Love: Labia of Love

    Savage Love: Labia of Love

    I have been insecure about the way my vagina looks for as long as I can remember. When I was young, I would fantasize about the day I would grow pubic hair long enough to cover its unsightliness. That day never came, and I was left with an enormous insecurity about it. My labia minora is oversize...

  • Savage Love: Sticking Points

    Savage Love: Sticking Points

    Sticking Points I am a 30-year-old trans guy, on T since college, happy and comfortable with my sexuality. However, I can’t find any helpful health info on a fetish I’ve developed: I insert needles directly into my clit, maybe an inch and a half in. I’m not talking through it, like a piercing,...

  • Savage Love: Ex and Friendship

    Savage Love: Ex and Friendship

    I’m a pretty quiet Midwestern woman currently wracked by a guilty Catholic conscience. My last boyfriend and I were in an open, long-distance relationship. We were together for a year and a half, and things were great fun. We considered each other our primary partners, but I met his other partners...

  • Savage Love: Spank U

    Savage Love: Spank U

    Is this even Dan? Probably not, probably an assistant, but maybe this will eventually get to him. I have a spanking fetish. I love to be spanked. I live in Oakland, California, so San Francisco is 10 minutes away. Seems like I’m in one of the best places in the country to have a kink, but I’m having...

  • Savage Love: Inanimate Objections

    Savage Love: Inanimate Objections

    My son is 15 going on 16, and he’s been experimenting with masturbation. At the moment, I pretty much just think fine, whatever, he’s a teenager, there’s very little I can do about it. So long as he doesn’t get porn-obsessed and start letting his grades slip, it’s fine. The issue is that, a few...

  • Savage Love: Rings & Things

    Savage Love: Rings & Things

    I’m a 20-something married trans guy in an openish marriage. In the online hunt for a guy to have some aboveboard, under-the-sheets fun with, I run into snags because I’m trans (I disclose on my profile) and because I’m married. I’m baby-stepping my way toward an offline search for guys, going...

  • Polyproblema

    Polyproblema

    Four years ago, I met a man on a “married but looking” website. We exchanged fantasies, which included wanting to have threesomes and a D/s relationship. He was 19 years my senior. I was 42 at the time. For three years, we met twice a week for drinks or sex. The sex was amazing. We had several...

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