Haute Dog Carte's Veggie Pup

6070 Falls Road, hautedogcarte.com, (410) 608-3500

Let's just get this out in the open now: Vegetarian hot dogs kinda suck. They either end up looking like tubes of hot vinyl (melted vinyl, when they come off the grill) or else they have the consistency of that pink slime you're trying to avoid in the first place, and they taste like, well, a fake hot dog. Our friends at the Haute Dog know this, which is why they take the time (about five minutes, last time we downed a dog at their Falls Road stand) to make fun of you when you order one of their life-changing veggie pups, a quarter-pound of phony frankfurter that compares favorably to a "half smoke" at the ballpark and will give you a faketasm in your mouth a lil' bit, especially when paired with one of their hearty toasted rolls and dressed with some of the Haute's kickass tomato-and-onion jam and some dijon mustard, yum. Plus, you could probably ask 'em to throw some of their bacon-and-onion marmalade on there and keep it on the down low, just sayin'. Arooo!

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