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Knowshon Moreno

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  • The Super Bowl-that fat, fantastic tick of a spectacle-is set to dig its massive, ad-bloated mandibles into nearly every inch of the American media's goose-pimpled flesh

    Are you ready for some football? No? Well you've got an extra week to get ready. Still don't think you'll be ready? Well sorry, you're boned, 'cause the Super Bowl-that fat, fantastic tick of a spectacle-is set to dig its massive, ad-bloated mandibles into nearly every inch of the American media's goose-pimpled flesh, and I for one couldn't be happier. This game has more stories than Bud's gonna have beer ads. Peyton Manning, with throwing mechanics as smooth as Velveeta processed cheese product fresh out of the microwave, and his Denver Broncos are taking on the Seattle Seahawks and their vaunted defense, led by Richard Sherman, the best in crunchtime this side of DORITOS JACKED Enchilada Supreme Flavored Tortilla Chips. My question for you, America: Are you ready to dip into the action?
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