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Time Flies Like An Arrow

Time Flies Like An Arrow

It is September, and I know you’re thinking what I’m thinking. That’s right. Darn it, I’m going to miss my fruit flies.

I was shopping online for a kicky djellaba to hide the hummus stains on my jeggings when it occurred to me: In mere months, my fruit fly collection will have been for naught! I rushed to the Waverly Farmer’s Market and picked up the worst-looking nectarine I could find. “Stippany, how much is this nectarine?” I asked the hunky teen manning the stone fruit. “And what kind of a name is Stippany?”

Stippany stoically informed me that since I retrieved the nectarine from the garbage, it was complementary and stop stealing the orchard’s garbage and...

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