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It's Cold and Flu and Ebola Season: Please to Go Wash Your Hands

It's Cold and Flu and Ebola Season: Please to Go Wash Your Hands

Holy crap, I almost didn’t even notice, but it is now...

I'm Walkin' Here

I Am Setting My Clock Back Now From Daylight Savings Time But You Can Live Any Way You Want

This week it is officially Fall, and I for one am totally...

Q&A Transcript of a non-hypothetical Conversation Between my Legal Counsel and Me

Q&A Transcript of a non-hypothetical Conversation Between my Legal Counsel and Me

I am happy to be using the space for...

Best of Baltimore is the Best, of Baltimore, and it's Next Week Right Here in City Paper

Best of Baltimore is the Best, of Baltimore, and it's Next Week Right Here in City Paper

Hey Baltimore, next week is my fave-rave time of the year, the Best episode of...

5 Orioles Facts and 5 Orioles Fictions

Fact: Despite all the injuries and inconsistencies, the Orioles are in first place....

U.S. AND A!

Thirty-two of the Earth's 196 nations—nearly 16 percent—are gripped...

It's hard not to be intimidated by a guy who taught himself to fight by punching down trees.

If City Paper were a shed, I'd be one of the duller tools, maybe the bowling ball...

With just one signing, Dan Duquette and Peter Angelos rewrote the Orioles off season playbook.

Hey Spring, thanks for coming. I don't want to sound like an ass-hat or anything,...

The Greatest Show on One Wheel

The NCAA Championships are this weekend, and my bracket isn't looking so hot....

TrawlerFesting

Like many a field trip, this one started with the phrase,...

Star Spangling

I feel like I’ve been star-spangled celebrating since...

Penny Slots

A lot of ink has been spilled about the new casino downtown. The folks in charge...

I Went to Ripley's, Believe It Or Not

When the ladyfriend asked me out on a date recently and hinted we’d be...

Summer Reading Challenge

Well, I’ve got to admit I haven’t had time to take a real field trip in...

Quiz: Which Word Document Template Are You?

Quiz: Which Word Document Template Are You?

What does your choice of Word document template have to say...

Time Flies Like An Arrow

Time Flies Like An Arrow

It is September, and I know you’re thinking what I’m thinking. That&...

A Slimy Recess

A Slimy Recess

I for one am swollen with relief at the...

Summer: It's What's Wrong with America

Many people ask me, “Why is summer such a problem this time of year?”...

Toby the Lobster

It is times like these, times when I am sandwiched between a low ceiling and a 6800...

It Ain't Over Till It's Over--and It Ain't Over Yet. Wait, Is It Over?

After heading to Kansas City down 0-2, the...

The Undercard

Being in first place doesn’t feel as good as it should. As it stands Monday...

Polyproblema

Polyproblema

Four years ago, I met a man on a “...

Foreign Affairs

Foreign Affairs

I’m 25, I’m virgin, and I find...

Friends in Need

Friends in Need

Friends in Need

Savage Love 9/24/14

Savage Love 9/24/14

Making a Move

Savage Love 9/17/14

Savage Love 9/17/14

Get It Together

Free Will Astrology

ARIES (March 21-April 19): New York City’s Diamond...

Free Will Astrology

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Situation No. 1: If you meet...

Free Will Astrology

ARIES (March 21-April 19): As I hike through the wilderness...

Free Will Astrology 9/24/14

ARIES (March 21-April 19): It’s no secret. The...

Free Will Astrology 9/17/14

ARIES (March 21-April 19): These horoscopes I write for you...

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