A short while ago, we were out drinking and noticed that the coaster advertised Alaska Distillery’s Smoked Salmon Vodka (ultra premium!). We’ve had some interesting infusions in our day—from bacon/Nilla Wafer vodka to leather-infused bourbon and beyond—but the idea of taking the "essence" of a smoked piece of fish and plopping it into a bottle of pure Alaskan iceberg-born vodka seems a bit like gobbledygook, if not exceedingly specific, considering that the only practical application would be to add the spirit to a bloody mary, as Alaska Distillery clearly indicates with its labeling. That, and maybe a vodka sauce to pour over pasta? What the hell else are you supposed to do with fish booze?
Fortunately, the smoked salmon spirit does add a certain interesting twist to your standard bloody; the resulting flavor is smooth, pretty salty, moderately fishy (actually reminiscent of clam juice in a way), and certainly smoky—but it doesn't necessarily shout "YES! This does taste like smoked salmon. Pass the capers!"
Apparently if done in “true Alaskan fashion,” according to the producer, the smoked salmon bloody mary is to be enjoyed with—you guessed it—chunks of smoked salmon in the mix. Sounds thrilling. But really, at what point is the bloody mary just going to be a full-blown meal in a glass? This shit is out of control. Bars are adding pieces of bacon, Slim Jim swizzles, oysters, lemon wedges, celery stalks, pieces of fish, fish essence, carrots, potatoes, the spirit of Christmas—at this point, they should just pour it into a bowl and call it Cold Tomato Soup with Various Things In It, charge $13, serve it with a side of dippin’ bread, and be done with it. In lieu of that, if you’re in the mood for a smoked-fish-flavored bloody that might just pique your interest, hit up Bar Liquorice (801 E. Fort Ave.,  708-1675, barliquorice.com).