Dan Savage

Columnist Savage Love

Recent Articles

  • Savage Love: JCCSF

    Savage Love: JCCSF

    I was honored to speak at JCCSF—Jewish Community Center of San Francisco—last week as a part of their "Uninhibited: About Sex" lecture series. The audience submitted questions on cards, which were ably put to me by Jourdan Abel, who was wearing a wonderful uterus-themed sweater. (Check out my Instagram...

  • Savage Love: Fixations, Oral and Otherwise

    I'm a 24-year-old male, married three years, monogamous. My wife and I are religious and were both virgins when we got married. I'm sexually frustrated with two things. (1) How can I get her to give me oral sex? (She has never given and I have never received oral sex. I regularly give her oral...

  • Savage Love: Safe Wording

    Savage Love: Safe Wording

    I'm a 27-year-old, feminist, conventionally attractive, straightish, GGG woman. Over time, my tastes have changed, and now I find myself more of a kinkster. A few years ago, my desire for kinkier sex and my willingness to take a chance came together in a mutually beneficial, exciting D/s relationship....

  • Savage Love: Doubts

    Savage Love: Doubts

    I'm your average straight 42-year-old white guy. Married for a little less than a year (second marriage for both). We have an active sex life and are both GGG. My wife wants to be forcibly fucked—held down and raped. Normally I'd be all over this because I do love me some rough sex. My issue: She...

  • Savage Love: Four Word Limit

    Savage Love: Four Word Limit

    Are you incapable of concision? Your answers are too long! You blather on, often rehashing the problem (unnecessary!) before giving four words (at most!) of (rarely!) useful advice. I've heard you say you have to edit letters down for space. Try this instead: Edit yourself! I want more of the letters—more...

  • Savage Love: Crosswords

    Savage Love: Crosswords

    Gay, thirtysomething male in D.C. My boyfriend of three years has been acting strange—not taking his antidepression meds, says he's feeling weird. He has withdrawn from me, sleeps 15 hours a day, and has been canceling on commitments to socialize with friends. That I am fine with—he's blue and...

  • Savage Love: The Past Is Never Dead

    Savage Love: The Past Is Never Dead

    My new girlfriend blurted out that she had a cuckolding past with her ex-husband. She says her ex badgered her into arranging "dates" with strangers and that he picked the guys. Her ex would then watch her having sex with a guy in a hotel room. The ex only watched and didn't take part. I am really...

  • Savage Love: Intropervert Dumps Extropervert

    Savage Love: Intropervert Dumps Extropervert

    Gay male in my late 20s. I recently ended things with a guy. Our relationship started as a strictly sexual one. We're both involved in the kink scene in our city and have interests that align in a particularly great way. Quickly it became clear there was a real connection. The next two months were...